Crazy Sex Acts. Which have you tried you Dirt Dog?!…

Whether or not you’ve tried some before, you have all at least heard of these crazy little sexual acts.  We just want to list the ones we know here so you can find out what they mean if you hear them in a conversation somewhere.  We will list the basic ones, such as the Donkey Punch and Dirty Sanchez, and we will list the more rare acts, such as the Alabama Hot Pocket.  Comment on them!  What’s your fave?!  If you know any others feel free to let us know about them and we will add them to the list so it is more complete.  Or, if you try any at home and have cool or funny stories, comment about them here!

Abe Lincoln – When a passed out person gets jizzed on their face, and then you cut their pubes and place them all over the cum, forming a ‘pube beard’.  Then you throw a top hat on their head.

AC Slater – Sitting reverse on a toilet seat and taking a shit.  (Not a sex act, but still a cool thing with a cool name.)

Alabama Hot Pocket – Taking a shit inside of the vagina… and then fucking it.  The Alabama part comes from some idea that dudes in Alabama would fuck pig trough’s or large piles of mud (Porky Piggin’) when they were bored.

Alaskan Pipeline – The act of shitting in a condom and then freezing it overnight.  Then you insert said condom into the girl’s anus.

Alligator Fuckhouse – Mid-coitus you bite your partner’s neck and lock down their arms and legs and proceed into a daring ‘deathroll’ while remaining inserted in her.

Angry Dragon – After you get a blow job and bust in her mouth you hit the girl in the back of the head so that it comes out her nose… like a dragon breathing fire!

Angry Pelican – While having sex with a girl on the beach, the man pulls out and sticks his dick in the sand… then places it back into the girl.

Angry Penguin – A woman is performing oral sex on a man and just when he is about to cum she just gets up and walks away.  The male, aroused with pants around his ankles, waddles after the woman like an Angry Penguin.

Angry Pirate – When getting head you pull out and bust in the girl’s eye.  You can also then kick her in the shin so it’s like she has an eye patch and a wooden peg leg!

The Beetle – When you insert one finger into the girl’s vagina and your thumb into the girl’s ass.  You then try to touch the finger and thumb together.  It’s like a little ‘pincher’ that a beetle would have.

Birmingham Booty Call – When fucking a girl you put her cell on vibrate and stick it in her ass.  As you are having sex you call her cell phone a few times, have her shit it out, answer it, and then talk dirty to you while still fucking.

Blumpkin – Getting a blowjob while taking a shit on the toilet.

Boston Pancake – The male lover dumps on the female’s chest and then flattens it down with their butt cheeks… like a flat pancake.  Then they can add semen to the top of it, like the syrup.

Chili Dog – You shit on a girl’s chest and then proceed to titty fuck her.

Cincinnati Bow Tie – Banging a girl in their tracheostomy (hole in the neck from severe lung problems), then pull out and cum on the neck.  It then looks similar to a bow tie.

Circle Jerk – Exactly as it sounds.  A bunch of dudes in a circle all jerking off.

Cleveland Steamer – Taking a dump on the woman’s chest during or after sex.  ‘Steamer’ may come from steam rising from the freshness of the crap.  Cleveland may be from the brown streak from the shit, like the Cleveland Browns.

Devil’s 3Way – Male, Male, Female threesome

Dirty Sanchez – After anal sex, the male pulls his dick out and wipes it across the female’s upper lip leaving an authentic looking mexican mustache!

Docking – The act of placing the head of ones penis inside the foreskin of another’s penis.

Donkey Punch – When having anal sex you punch the girl in the back of the head very hard causing her to clench her anal muscles tighter and giving you a better orgasm.

Dump Truck – You tuck your dick and balls between your legs and cum on a girl’s face… All while backing up and shitting on her chest and making crazy beeping noises like a dump truck.

Dutch Rudder – 2 guys stand facing each other.  They each grab their own dick with their right hand.  The other guy grabs their right arm with his left arm and he moves it in a circular or up and down motion.  It’s like someone else is jerking you off without actually touching your dick.

Eiffel Tower – (In a Devil’s 3Way) – One guy gets the girl from behind while she bends forward and blows the other guy.  The two guys then do a double Hi 5 over the top of the girl… forming a structure similar to the Eiffel Tower!

The Fraver – Also known as ‘The Flap-Jackie’ – Eating pancakes off of a girl’s bare breasts.  Pouring syrup and using spray butter on the nipples is encouraged!

Golden Shower – Simple act of peeing on your partner… for some sort of pleasure activity.

The Gonzo – Similar to ‘Tea Bagging’, the Gonzo is when you lay your balls and dick on someone’s face resembling the nose and eyes made popular by the famous Muppet Gonzo!

Hot Lunch – Shitting in the girl’s mouth and then fucking it and cumming so she has hot shit and cum in her mouth at once.

Houdini – When banging a girl from behind in doggystyle, you pull out and fake an orgasm and spit on the girl’s back so she thinks you came on her.  When she turns around you actually bust in her face.

Jackhammer – Furiously finger-banging a girl.  You probably want to keep the wrist firm here and pump from the elbow to make it go faster.

Ookie Gookie Cookie – A game played by all males.  Men form in a circle around a cookie.  They all begin jerking it until they have to cum.  They all cum on to the cookie.  The last guy to cum has to eat the cookie.  Gross.

Pearl Necklace – When a male cums on his partner’s neck.  The white cum around the neck resembles a white pearl necklace.

Pink Sock – The result of excessive anal pounding.  The intestines actually exit through the anus, forming a dangling mass, resembling a pink sock.

Porky Piggin’ – Dudes (most likely down South) banging a pig’s trough or large piles of mud.

The Rodeo – When a male hides in a dark room waiting for a female to enter.  Once she enters, the male yells ‘I’m gonna fuck you!’.  He then jumps on her back and tries to stay on for as long as possible.

Rusty Trombone – The male is standing upright receiving a rim job while the girl is also giving a reach around hand job, resembling playing the trombone.

The Shocker – Also known as ‘2 in the Pink, 1 in the stink’ – The act of finger blasting a girl with your pointer and middle fingers while your pinky is penetrating the girl’s asshole.

Space Docking – Shitting into a girl’s vagina.

Strawberry Shortcake – After cumming on a girl’s face after a bj you punch her in her nose so the blood and semen merge together to form a liquid that resembles the topping of a strawberry shortcake.

Soup Kitchen – A Group of Hobo’s breaking into a car and having a gang bang.

Tea Bag – To place your sagging balls on someone’s face.  This is funny when they are drunk and/or sleeping and you take a picture of it!

Tony Danza – When fucking a girl from behind you ask her ‘Who’s the boss?’  When she turns her head you punch her in her face and scream ‘TONY DANZA!’

ZJ – If you don’t know what it is… you can’t afford it.

About corky york

Just because I rock; doesn't mean I'm made of stone...

Posted on July 1, 2011, in HUMOR and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 22 Comments.

  1. Charles Stillwater

    Another to add… The Gonzo. An act in which you sit on a sleeping girls head hold the tip of your penis lift upwards and let it drop over her nose resembling the lovable sesame street character, Gonzo.

    • Charles,

      Thanks for helping to add to the list, however, if you look closely The Gonzo is already in the list. The acts are listed in alphabetical order.

      Thanks,
      Corky!

  2. Oh how about that totally missed that! OMG! I’ll let you know if I come up with some more that aren’t already on the list!

  3. The Jordan Masurat? When you clip your toenails and then hide them in your foreskin. No you stick your dick in a guys ass and pull your foreskin back leaving the toenails in his ass.

  4. Sicilian goggles – When a girl is laying on her back, with her head hung over the edge of the bed sucking your dick, you ram your dick all the way down her throat and your balls rest in her eye sockets…

    Himalayan heimlich – When banging a girl doggystyle, you pull a sock off with your right hand and have a freezing cold popsicle in the other, you cram the sock in her mouth then directly afterwards you ram the popsicle in her ass and grab her like your trying to keep her from chocking and see how long you can hold on.

    Cajun Hot Stick – With a dip in your mouth and your banging a girl from behind you pull the dip out with your finger and shove it in her ass…

  5. Hey do you have any more I have never heard of these before thanks

  6. Monkey face

    While victim is sleeping shave ur pubes off and hold them in one had while jacking it with the other, cum in there face and immediately throw pubes into face all th while screaming MONKEY FACE!!!!!!

  7. The Magician
    While doing her from behind make sure shes facing a window and switch with your buddy run outside and wave to her

  8. Simba: dip your thumb in cum and rub it on a girls forehead while saying “siiimmmbaaa”.

  9. Thanks on your marvelous posting! I really enjoyed reading it,
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  10. Je suis une femme de quarante-six ans .
    Mon nom est Cécile.
    Je suis ingénieur … il apparaît que je suis geignarde.

  11. ça va ? Je porte le joli nom de Fleurette.

    Je suis une vieille de quarante-deux années !
    Ce que je fais , accessoiriste de spectacles … On dit régulièrement de moi que je suis cool.

  12. rusty venture- jerking off until your dick get all red and sore

    snake venom- A sexual act where two males 69 and fill each other’s mouth with cum. Then you turn over and blow spooge into each other’s faces.

    Double Frogman- What you do is you take a scuba snorkel and you put your dick in the wee bendy mouth part, you sneak right up your back address, Kay? Then you just grab the middle of that snorkel and you’re fucking your own ass and pulling off your crank at the self-same time

  13. J’ai 33 ans .
    Arianne à votre service
    Mon travail est responsable d’atelier … Mes amis racontent que je suis souriante.

  14. I know a cool sex act, putting a pealed ginger in a girls ass.while slapping her ass really hard.But a even better sex act is blending a pealed ginger and half of a small red pepper adding women and men lubrican and keepining it in the refriegerator not freezer.then when cool you poure it in a girls ass or pussy.this will make her super horny.p.s don’t forget to slap her ass very hard,for it to work.

  15. Hello; J’ai 35 ans , et j’assume totalement .
    je suis Édith
    Je suis une attachée de presse ! Mon caractère est plutôt réservé.

  16. Hello; Je suis une jeune femme de quarante-cinq années .

    Je porte le joli nom de Hortense.
    je suis un stage de infirmière . Est-ce un défaut que d’être drole ?

  17. they forgot a dirty chewbacca

  18. The alaskan fire dragon – the act of lighting the females pubes on fire, and then jizzing the fire out

  19. You have the rodio style wrong. When your hitting it from behind you pull her hair shuve your thumb up her ass and tell her that her sister looks alot better than she dose. Then you try holding on as long as you can. That’s the only one I know so thanks for the new ones

  20. the spider: act of having intercourse in the shower where the female is facing the wall and has both hands on the wall then you proceed to whisper ” i have aids ” in her ear. she then tries to climb up the wall like a spider.

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